Thursday, January 21, 2010

How do you see yourself?

So I've been thinking about self-image issues a lot lately. I had a group of girls over at my apartment last weekend and we were talking about body image in the media, and how on blogs and message boards fat girls are saying skinny girls look like emaciated skeletons and skinny girls are saying fat girls are disgusting and lazy. Likewise, when i was a teenager this boy I liked called me a tree trunk. Weird insult, but amazing how the embarrassment has stuck with me. Obviously there should be no ideal body type, and everyone's body should be celebrated. But how do we get young girls to understand this? Is it perfunctory to feel bad about yourself growing up because you're different, whether it's too tall, too short, too dark, too chubby or whatever it is? Is there a way to instill self esteem in girls, or do they have to get there, as I did, through a long, difficult, self-doubting process? I certainly don't have the answer, but a couple things that have been boosting my self-esteem lately: bright red lipstick, and these Jeffrey Campbell shoes, which I am hoping to buy eventually (Shoutout: barefoottess.com!). Hey, it's the little things that count.

12 comments:

jheri said...

I went through years of self doubt and just plain being upset with myself until I was about twenty. I wish there was a better path to self confidence. I was not good in school and did not participate in sports. I can't say I even had close friends as a kid other than my dog.

But that has all changed and I'm very happy with who I am and my somewhat strange to fit body. I just wish I could have learned from someone or that someone could learn from me.

Unknown said...

Every hunab being is unique in himself, so no ppint in being worrisome.

Anonymous said...

I'm still working on the self confindnce thing. I think that for younger girls it will continue to be an issue, potentially even getting worse, until we completely change the culture that they grow up in. In one of my classes we had talked a lot about positive body images and communicating those to the young women in our lives.

Unknown said...

I like tall girls! They are
very hot:)

prshepp said...

I am 6', and have 2 daughters who are tall. My 12 year old is doing dance for PE at school right now, and none of the boys want to dance with her because she is "too tall."

At home, she loves her height, even wishes to be taller, because she is actually on the shorter side for our family. It amazes me how the perspective shifts so dramatically between private and public life. All I can do is assure her that the boys will grow up, both physically and mentally, but, unfortunately that does little to soothe the hurt right now.

Unknown said...

@ Pamela

you havent told about the height of your daughters. i wanna know.

Unknown said...

Hey I am 196cm tall (I am Hungarian and we use centimeters) and I accept my height with stoic calmness.

sanjeet said...

I was not good in school and did not participate in sports. I can't say I even had close friends as a kid other than my dog.
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britni said...

I struggled with this too, and lately it has popped back up in my life. I'm 6'2" and my husband recently asked me not to wear heels when we go out, and it has nearly broken my heart :( I think the best thing we can do is just stand up straight to set the example ;)

Sarah was here said...

A boy called me a lighthouse when I was in 8th grade. Another weird insult. Also, I was at Yosemite one summer a couple years ago and some middle aged guy came up to me and asked: 1.) how tall I was, 2.) If I played basketball, and 3.) If he could take a picture with me!!! Do I look like a circus clown or something? When they ask me if I play basketball/volleyball, whatever, I ought to ask them, "Do YOU play mini golf?" lol

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